Pastor's Wife, Mom, Writer & Imperfect Seeker of Jesus
Pastors' Wives--Mark As Defective
September 18, 2015
After I’ve yelled at my kids for the nineteenth time in two days, after I’ve neglected to follow up with someone who came to me on Sunday with a problem, after I’ve forgotten a relative’s birthday and after I’ve gone down another isle in the store when I saw someone from church who I seriously didn’t have the energy to deal with in that moment, I realize just how inadequate I am to be a minister’s wife, a co-shepherd if you will.
Add in my many and scandalous past sins, and I begin to ask God, “Are You sure that You didn’t make a mistake? I KNOW You could have found someone much more qualified for this role!”
Satan doesn’t always try to take you out right at the knees with a sledgehammer. No, he often simply and subtly taps away ever so inconspicuously with a thumbtack hammer. It may take longer, but the effect is the same.
We feel worn down, exhausted and inadequate.
I’m repeatedly amazed at some of the strange and unexpected places in Scripture that bring me comfort on life’s journey. Recently my small group study led me back to Matthew 1 and the genealogy of Jesus. I’m not sure if it was that exciting for the ladies in my group, but it sure reminded me of some facts that were an encouragement to my tattered self. You are probably well-versed in the story already, but I found the reminder refreshing.
Remember that the Gospel of Matthew was written specifically to the Jewish people in order to demonstrate that Jesus was in fact the long hoped for Messiah. This was a culture very stringent about propriety and rules, having 613 rules that must be followed in order to live without sin. Bloodlines were also extremely valued, following the ancestry of the Jewish males. So for Matthew to not only include five women, but WHICH particular five women are listed, speaks volumes about our God.
There is a wealth of information that can be studied about each woman, but in a nutshell:
Tamar was most likely a Canaanite who disguised herself as a prostitute in order to sleep with her father-in-law Judah so that she could become pregnant.
Rahab was a Canaanite woman from Jericho who didn’t just disguise herself as a prostitute, she WAS a prostitute by profession.
Ruth was a Moabite widow who remained with her Jewish mother-in-law even though they were without any male caregivers at the time.
Bathsheba, referred to only as Uriah’s wife in this genealogy, was quite possibly a Hittite and was the woman who had an affair with King David.
Mary was the only certain Jewish female of the list, but was a young non-married pregnant girl.
I mean, really, if I were choosing to list women in a genealogy at all, it certainly would not be these five! Although I guess you can’t really leave out Mary. But the other four would definitely NOT make the cut. That is again…if I were the one choosing them.
But I am so thankful that the Lord did. He reminds me that He is the One who takes broken and botched people and uses them for His glory. That it is in fact THROUGH our brokenness that the light of Christ actually shines the brightest. “But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.’ Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me. So I take pleasure in weaknesses, insults, catastrophes, persecutions, and in pressures, because of Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10 HCSB)
So on those days when you feel the most inadequate to be a pastor’s wife, remember to take pleasure in your inadequacy, because HE is MORE THAN ADEQUATE! And if through your brokenness Christ can shine, then you are just who He wants.